Assertive or assertive behavior is a term in the first half of the 20th century, presented by New York psychologist Andrew Salter1 denote the ability to express and defend their rights without violating the other. It was. "Freedom of expression of all emotions vis-à-vis a third party, with the exception of fear" recently by Joseph Wolpe, a psychiatrist and professor of medicine in the United States, which he developed Several popular books were 20th in the second half of the century to promote assertiveness, especially published in connection with personal development.
Beginning
The word comes from the French assertive assertiveness, "say" noun formed from the verb to assert, affirm, assert, defend their rights, defend their views formed. Assertiveness can be translated into French of assertiveness.
Definition
Assertiveness is the art to convey a message without passivity difficult, but not aggressive.
Some schools of thought suggest variations in this definition, such as the principles of honesty, or Palo Alto radical advocates that we must always speak his mind.
In the context of human relationships, assertiveness is presented as a behaviors that want to use the refusal, three types of negative behaviors:
Aggressive behavior (or rule by force);
Submissive behaviors that may occur flights or task;
Manipulation of behavior (or rule by deceit), sometimes expressed as mental manipulation.
The choice assertive behavior after the adoption of the "life position" corresponds.
Assertiveness is studied in areas such as social psychology and management.
Applications
Generate as much for Nonviolent Communication, a domino effect would increase or partners and the quality of the relationship and understanding mutuelle 2 a time, a virtuous circle.
Although assertiveness is not a technique, but an attitude to develop techniques for implementation.
Management
Skills related to assertiveness sont3:
Respect and be respected
Develop good personal insurance
Often identify their attitude
Know how to deal with passive aggressive and manipulative behavior,
Communicate effectively.
Think assertive techniques
Fogging technique is to start with a search for common ground insulation, on which agreement is possible before. Contradict the part of speech to which oppose4
The technique, which is known as "Broken Record" (or broken record) simply repeats a query each time a view of resistance illegitimate. The term refers to the record scratched on the surface, reproducing the same sequence loop. A disadvantage of this practice is that the application of its strength, as it is repeated, which are then turned against the user must repressive is available loses measured. Another disadvantage is that in order to manipulate, in contrast to its purpose, which, in some cases designed as aggressive or as an attempt.
The technique of "negative view" five asks a surplus of criticism, precisely.
The technique of the statement of "I" would make their wishes and opinions expressed without judgment about other perspectives.
Transactional Analysis
Human behavior and life positions
With respect to the transaction analysis corresponds life position to be assertive "I'm OK, you're OK" (ideal relationship as transactional analysis). Deposits assertive mutual respect of opinions, it is because I like something that others do not love without reason.
Diagram to: human behavior and life positions
I'm OK, you're OK: Assertiveness
I'm OK, you're not OK: Assault (or rule by force) / manipulation (or rule by stealth)
I'm not OK, you're OK: Presentation
I'm not okay, you're not OK: Abandon
Reviews of these techniques
Some authors say that the assertive techniques sometimes doubtful whether its use should be able to form the manipulation6 who would disagree with the first principle to deny profound exactly cause this behavior.
If Assertiveness is the art of concession and compromise that the reduction of assertiveness on "Tips and Tricks" is sometimes seen as a perversion of the meaning of the risk of falling into caricature. Create assertiveness techniques or methods are,therefore a risk of conflict with the definition of perseverance.
In 1970 and 1980, while assertiveness was popular, some of the participants practice "to do evil things in the name of perseverance, cold as someone again, they wanted to get" 7
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